Umm... I really want to change my life recently. How? I have no idea, it's definitely my own business though... Maybe I need someone who show me another new world.
I have a best male friend. He knows all my character, so I'm very comfortable with him. I respect him with some good points which I don't have. But,,, I think it is not good if I just spend with him whole of my life, because he seems not to consider me as his partner. Apparently he and I have nothing in common. It is fun to chatting over drinking, but he don't show interest in my topic which is heavy themes such as world poverty.
I've noticed my own true feeling recently. Although I like to spend alone, the reason is just I assumed firmly anyone who I love don't love me. Why do I think so? I don't know. It might be I don't like me by myself. However I am getting to think it was my silly belief which I made in my mind. Why did I need to assume that I could not meet my lover forever? I've not even looked for someone who has a lot of in common with me.
Unless I eliminate my dangerous illusion, I cannot share sweet and bitter of life with anyone. It might be time to change my go-it-alone mentality.
